TV Review - The New Girl

With the new TV season upon us I am going to comment on a few shows, some I watch, some I don't. This is the the latter...

Fact Number 1, Hipsters love Zooey Deschanel, no getting around this.
Fact Number 2, Hipsters are slowly taking over the world.

So if you take those two facts the New Girl has to be a hit right, WRONG.

Here's what will happen. My friend Yoshi puts the number of Hipsters around 9.8 million, and in theory most will watch the New Girl.  That's where the numbers start falling apart though, of that 9.8 million, about a million refuse to watch TV, don't own one and will make sure you know that. So that number is down to 8.8 million, but of that number, 8 million would never watch a TV show live, way to unhip, they aren't their parents you know! So 2 million will DVR it, and watch it at a fairly ironic time (say 2:17am).

So where does that leave the other 6 million or so? They will fire up their MacBooks to go to Hulu.com, and assume the show will be on there, if not...well shit will hit the fan. They will accuse the networks for not wanting something good to succeed, thus validating the fact that they hate anything popular. Some will try to torrent it, but that is just something most pretend to know about to be hip and most will fail.

So after that there will be about 700k hipsters and maybe a million non-hipsters watching The New Girl. Also once the hipsters find out their parent or a friends parent watched it and liked it, that viewership will take yet another hit.  I expect the show to last about 3 episodes.